Thursday, October 31, 2013

A Zombie for Halloween

Have you met Freddie the Zombie?


http://www.amazon.com/Sexy-Undead-Witches-ebook/dp/B00CLYIMD0/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1383226387&sr=1-1&keywords=charity+parkerson

Blurb:

From Award Winning Author, Charity Parkerson:
A potion gone wrong, or right?Single, unemployed, and in charge of her very own pet zombie, Ella Perry is cooking up trouble, and it's raining men.

Ella has spent years searching for a cure for a zombie named Freddie. However, when an experimental concoction takes an unexpected turn, she gets a glimpse of the life she's been missing by hanging out with the undead.

Zombies, Angels, and Pixies. Oh my! Don't miss out on the first book in the new "Sexy Witches" series by Bestselling Author Charity Parkerson.

The "Sexy Witches" series:

  • The Sexy & The Undead
  • Wanted: Hexed or Alive
  • The Pixie & The Prince
  • Tasting Temptation
  • The Wizard & The Wanton

Excerpt:

Ella would be hard-pressed to explain exactly how she ended up with her very own pet zombie, if anyone ever expected to hear the story. Nonetheless, here she was at twenty-six, single, unemployed, and with a zombie named Freddie to support. It was not cheap keeping up the care of a zombie. There were codes, visits to the zombie witchdoctor—do not get her started on the food bill—and a zombie sitter; those were almost impossible to find. That was why she was now fifteen minutes late to the very first job interview she had managed to land in six months with Freddie in tow, and no idea what she was going to do.
She found the tiny shop squeezed between an organic food store and a nail salon. She almost missed it, but at the last moment, she caught sight of the gold-embossed letters spelling out Cruz Apothecary across a red door. The windows were dark and dingy, causing a person’s eyes to automatically skirt past it, but since she was already late, it looked like heaven to her. Inside, the place appeared a bit more cheerful, with bright yellow walls and shiny oak shelves lining each one. A cream-colored loveseat sat wedged between two huge shelves covered in corked and colored glass bottles. She led Freddie in its direction. It was not the ideal place to leave him, but he was better off here than in her apartment unsupervised. Unfortunately, Freddie was having none of it. No matter what she did or promised, he would not stay put.
As a last resort, since she was feeling desperate, she brought out the big guns. “I promise to take you hiking on the wilderness trail as soon as we leave here, and you can eat all the little critters you find.”
At one time, Freddie had been a handsome man, but his curse had stolen most of his looks, and his slightly drooping hazel eyes now reminded her of a pouting hound dog. Freddie huffed, but stilled at her words, and she sighed in relief.
“Remarkable!” a male voice exclaimed behind her, startling her so much that she clutched her chest. Spinning, Ella kept her hand pressed to her breast, trying to still her racing heart. A man wearing a white lab coat stood mere inches from her, appearing every inch the mad scientist. His sandy-brown hair stood on end and he held a black-rimmed pair of glasses up to his eyes in order to inspect Freddie closer. “I’ve heard of their existence, but this is my first time actually seeing a Homo Coprophagus Somnambulus.”
Freddie was of average height for a man, coming in around five-foot-ten, but the scientist towered over him, and Ella could see Freddie beginning to shuffle anxiously. Stepping between them, Ella forced the man to take a step back and focus on her. “Freddie is a good boy,” she remarked, as if she were talking about a dog instead of the undead. He shoved his glasses all the way onto his face, and assessed her with his dark-blue eyes. She felt an overwhelming desire to smooth her blonde hair and make certain her blouse was wrinkle free.
“Ella Perry, I presume,” he said, sounding a little too pompous for her liking, but good manners won out, and she held her hand out for him to shake.
“Yes, and you are . . .” she trailed off.
“Dr. Randall Cruz,” he answered as he reached for her hand, and she almost groaned. Of course, he was the one interviewing her today.
As soon as their palms touched, Freddie sprang into action and clamped his powerful jaw around Randall’s wrist. Randall released a howl of pain, and Ella froze in shock at the sight of Freddie chomping on her—hopefully but unlikely—new boss. Freddie made a “nom-nom-nom” sound, jerking Ella from her shocked haze. Digging through her purse, she pulled out her make-up case.
“Stop, Freddie! Down, Freddie! Bad, Freddie!” she screamed while flashing the tiny mirror from her compact in the zombie’s face.
With a screech, Freddie cowered from the sight of the mirror, and flung himself face first onto the couch behind him. However, Randall ran in a small circle, howling in a mixture of outrage and pain while frantically waving his arm from side to side. Ella watched the doctor’s hop-skip-run dance in confusion. Freddie had gnawed on her several times and she knew from experience that it did not hurt that bad. When it finally occurred to her what the real problem was, she had to stop herself from slapping her forehead in disgust.
“Oh, there’s no need to worry,” she told him soothingly. “He’s not contagious.”
Randall froze mid-frantic wave with his mouth still stretched wide in a silent scream. She watched as his face changed almost comically from terror to confusion, before finally ending in curious calculation. “I thought zombies ate people, then whatever was left of them turned into a zombie, and so on and so forth,” he mused, the scientist in him showing itself.
Ella giggled. “You watch too many movies.”
“I resent that,” he said hotly. “I don’t watch movies at all. I read books,” he added with an offended sniff.
“Those ridiculous fiction books,” Ella retorted.
“Well, yes,” Randall admitted. “But still, most myths are based on some form of truth, so you must concede that my fears are not unfounded.”
“Freddie here is a victim of a bitter witch’s curse,” Ella confessed, shaking her head sadly. “He was too sexy for his own good, and too stupid to know not to two-time a witch.” Ella waved the mirror in Randall’s direction. “Part of his curse is a fear of mirrors, as punishment for his vanity.”
Freddie emitted an offended grunt and Ella patted his head. “No worries, babe. You’re much smarter now. Unfortunately, you’re not quite as handsome, but the intelligence level has seen a definite spike.”
Randall looked back and forth between them and snorted. “And you call me ridiculous.”
Ella looked pointedly at his hand before slowly raising her eyes back to his and lifting her eyebrows, making him blush. “Yes, well,” he stuttered, sounding embarrassed. Ella did nothing to alleviate his discomfort and he glanced around the room, attempting to avoid her gaze. Forgetting about the mirror she held, Ella accidentally flashed it in Freddie’s direction, causing him to let out a pitiful moan and the scientist jumped a foot. In a rush to get away, he stumbled and then quickly righted himself.


“Our interview,” she called at his retreating back, causing him to freeze in his tracks. Without turning, he called over his shoulder, “Be here at eight a.m. sharp tomorrow morning, and leave the zombie at home.”  

About the Author

Charity Parkerson is an award winning and multi-published author with Ellora's Cave Publishing, Midnight Books, and Punk & Sissy Publications. Born with no filter from her brain to her mouth, she decided to take this odd quirk and insert it in her characters. 
  • 2013 Readers' Favorite Award winner
  • ARRA Finalist for Favorite Paranormal Romance
  • Five-time winner of The Mistress of the Darkpath
  • Named one of the top 10 best books by an Indie author in 2011- Paranormal Reads Reviews
  • Best Paranormal Romance of 2012- Paranormal Reads Reviews
  • Quoted in the Sydney Morning Herald as an authority on Independent Publishing.

Connect with her online:


Editorial Reviews


"A romantic novel with a hefty dose of humor that actually contains a plot and likable, well drawn characters is a rare beast. If you are looking for one, you have found it."--Top Amazon Reviewer--Oleg Medvedkov
"Remarkably Witty" -- Top Amazon Reviewer- Dennis Waller
"Hot enough to raise the dead"-- EdenMary Black

Available online where most books are sold. 

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